На мен са ми малко твърде... ммм... агресивни. бързи. Обичам си по-старите работи. Тези мога да ги слушам за фон в някоя кръчма или за някое хубаво пого (но като се замисля май в тия погота се въртят и кубинки, което го избягвам). Така че пак са си музика, но аз си падам повече по старото.
A това е идеалната тема за вероятно познатите на всички ни Metal Heroes
Това е най-пълната компилация, която лично аз съм събрал. Ако са се появили нови или случайно съм изпуснал нещо - добавяйте
This is the situation: There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castle guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the story with different kind of metalheads as knights.
*POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
*THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and f*s her.
*HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and f*s the princess.
*FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave... without the princess.
*VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
*DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, f*s the princess and kills her, then leaves.
*BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
*GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, f*s the princess and kills her. Then he f*s the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he f*s the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and f*s it for the last time.
*DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
*PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
*GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
*NEO METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
*INDUSTRIAL METAL:
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
*GRINDCORE:
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
*SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
*CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having ... before marriage."
*BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
*EMOCORE:
The protagonist's mother drives the protagonist and his friends to the castle. He kills the dragon with some awesome arm-spinning and spin-kicking while his friends observe the scene with their arms crossed; then the princess laughs at the protagonists ridiculous hairstyl and the boys leave weeping.
*PUNK:
The protagonist hitchhikes to the castle, asks the dragon for some bucks, buys some cans of beer, gets pissed, insults the princess as "monarchist kunt and "commerce bicth and leaves the castle in a black maria.
*PORNO GRIND:
The Protagonist arrives at the castle without any clothes on and grunts loudly for a few minutes. Then he f*s the dragon in every body cavity it has, kills the dragon, f*s the carcass the same way again, grunts loudly again for a few minutes, grabs the princess and f*s her in every body cavity she has, kills her and f*s her in the same way again. Then he piles up the dragon's and princess's remains, f*s them in every body cavity they have, grunts loudly and screams senselessly for a few minutes. Then he leaves.
*POP ROCK:
The protagonist arrives in a limo. The dragon lets them in as long as they sign an autograph for its mom who is a big fan. The protagonist leaves with the princess and they get married.
*GOTHIC METAL:
The protagonist arrives along with a cold wind of winter in the middle of the night, frustrates the heck out of the dragon until it dies of fear and desolation, comes to the princess and discusses how to clean make- ups without inflicting skin irritation.
*METALCORE:
The protagonist swings his feet and arms about wildly, accidentally knocking the dragon out. Then he storms off in anger that someone messed up his dance routine.
*GRUNGE
The protagonist doesn't get eaten by the dragon because he stinks too much from not washing his hair in months. The princess won't go near him either, and he ends up dying on the town hall steps with the other grungers due to the over consumption of white cider.
*POP-PUNK
The dragon can't eat the protagonist because he can't catch him because he keeps bouncing up and down. The princess won't f*s him either, because he likes ska.
Editor's note: I'm leaving emo in only because it's funny, but am separating it from the others as a matter of principle, as it 1. has nothing to do with metal, and 2. should not exist. "Nu Metal" was pushing it, for that matter. And I may be out of the loop, but... "Battle Metal"? ...... ???
*EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess is very happy, because he was a whiny loser anyway.
(в тая връзка и последният Trivium не струва. Сега са го обърнали пък на някво тъпо хеви едва ли не. А заглавията на песните не стига, че са малоумни, ами са и претенциозни. Кой идиот прави уж концептуален албум с името Shogun и после 2/3 албум вдъхновен от древногръцката митология... 
)... Но да се върна към The End 
.